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I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.

 

This rendition sung by Colin Thackeray hit me hard!

As I listened and watched his delivery it evoked so many emotions. The regal red figure   stood there straight and proud, happy to display his vulnerability with honesty.  He wore his 89 years of age well and his few minutes on stage made us reflect on what is important in life! It also brought back wonderful memories of my dad who sang to us all the time. He also served proudly as a bomber pilot in the World War 2. I could imagine my dad singing this song to my mom who was the ‘wind beneath his wings.’ I miss them both and was reminded of the legacy they have left behind in their family.

Dad during World War 2

 

But I’ve got it all here in my heart

The last 18 months have been a test for us as some unpredictable factors affected the security of our life here in North Vancouver. We wondered if we should sell up and downsize. Forego the responsibilities of having a home with a garden……

I know this is JUST a garden but the thought of losing my forest garden filled me with utter despair. I love this piece of Canadian soil and have spent hours toiling in it and bringing it back to its former splendour. But the reality was that we might have to leave this all behind.

Was this a First World problem? I think not. When you leave your home country and move far away, your home becomes your security and your refuge as a family. My parents left the UK and settled in South Africa. We were very conscious of the fact that the move had been hard for them, especially for my dad. But he never let it get to him. This is when the GRIT kicks in. Thanks for the genes, mom and dad!

 

I can fly higher than an eagle.

Sh..t happens, and when it does you fight back and regroup as a family. I am so grateful for the family that we have and for the support and love they have shown us. Life just seems so worthwhile when I have ‘my tribe’ around me. Colin Thackeray showed us too how he appreciated his family. It has inspired him to keep up his enthusiasm for life. So much so that he competed and won the recent Britain’s Got Talent competition. How amazing is that? For those that watched the attached video, you will have noticed that along with family members in the audience, there were his two friends. They were also dressed up in their red regalia and were with him every inch of the way.

 

For you are the wings beneath my wings.

As you can see, Mr. Thackeray reminded me this morning of the people who have influenced who I am (mom and dad), those who love and support me (my family and friends) and those who form part of my tribe.

So as the sounds of music float through my kitchen I am reminded that…

You are the wind beneath my wings.

The Morkel family

 

 

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In the mirror of your eyes…….

My rugged African pot stood sheepishly at the foot of my driveway all decked out with its hessian bow. It had to endure the humiliation along with the many other corners of my house. There is much to celebrate….the Winter Solstice heralds the fact that our days will slowly become longer and our nights shorter. Then we have my favourite time of the year. Need I say, it is Christmas.  The wonder and joy of the season here in the northern hemisphere is magical.

A delicate twist to my African roots!

I can see it all so clearly…..

The steep pathway down to the house is lit up with fairy lights. They have a double function; both to illuminate the slippery staircase and to add a flickering twinkle to the arduous task of getting up and down to the house. Although when your arms are piled high with copious bags of groceries and replenishment stocks to the bar fridge, the lights are the last thing on your mind. But it is so worth the effort!

Like an image passing by……

The twins made a quick pre-Christmas visit to drop Leo off for a few weeks while their parents had a well-deserved family holiday. Leo is the much loved golden retriever. While the dogs got reacquainted, the twins helped decorate the Christmas tree.  There is much to be said for having your family traditions and I sat back and lapped up the scene. Deliberation reigned as the two placed the carefully chosen ornaments on the branches. There was much teetering on the chairs and discussion. Both of them are fiercely independent and I had to restrain myself from intervening in their creative activity. I watched and listened as the two repeated history.

Katy added her magical touch…

Christmas finally arrived and we all gathered together to celebrate. Stuffed turkey, glazed ham and red cabbage cooked in apple juice and topped with cranberries was on the menu. Dessert was a homemade salted caramel ice cream topped with meringues. These were made from scratch too. Thank goodness Christmas only comes once a year!

Christmas traditions with Jack …..tartan and pajamas.

Like reflections of your mind……

Besides all the preparation that goes along with Christmas, it is a time of remembrance and soul searching for me. I was continually reminded how my mom managed a house full at Christmas with such grace. There was always delicious food and all were welcome at our table. I missed them both and found myself reflecting back now that I am ‘the nanny’ and all the kids descend on our house at Christmas. There is much music, laughter and plenty of food.

So now we will go our separate ways…..

So another New Year is about to begin. We all need to go out and carry on with our lives. I will bathe in the love that I feel. This was brought home to me when my granddaughter said goodbye at the car. I was securing her seat belt and she tilted her little head forward and said: “Nanny I will dream about you.”

Best wishes for 2019 go to all of you and may you always have something to look forward to.

Christmas Cousins

From The Heart…..

 

“Congratulations! You’ve reached the next step in the citizenship process.”

This was the email that suddenly appeared in my inbox late yesterday. It came from the Immigration, Refugees and Citizenship Canada. There was an initial rush of excitement. We were almost there. It meant there was just one more appointment with the authorities.

Within the next month we would be singing…..Oh Canada!

I slept badly which surprised me as I thought the news of the previous day would send me into a soporific dreamland. Somewhere through my wakeful periods and my jumbled dreams came these uncomfortable thoughts. They were thoughts of failure, abandonment and being disloyal. Was I being disloyal by taking on the citizenship and culture of another country? It seemed fortuitous but I then received a message from a dear friend to say she was standing outside what she thought was my family home in Stellenbosch. The tears just rolled down my cheeks. So many happy family memories and the faces of the people that I love filled my mind. I still love South Africa and the Western Cape and all that goes with that…..

Please don’t think that I need you to feel sorry for me, I certainly do not. This was all my own doing. But have you any idea how hard this is? I have knowingly left behind 60 years of all that is familiar, my history, my dear friends and estranged family members. Family often take strain with this whole process too as they feel that you have run from your responsibilities. But my responsibility had to be firstly to my immediate family. Fortunately I knew my parents understood that and they gave me their blessing.

I have allowed myself to be sad today. I mourn the life I once had in South Africa and the people that I love back there. When the time comes, I will sing the Canadian Anthem with pride but the gentle words of Nkosi Sikeleli will play a soft tune in the background of my mind.

I never thought it would come to this! The art of serving up a culinary delight that you could feast your eyes on, is no more. No salivating over the presentation of a delicious plate of pasta dressed with olive oil and fresh basil. No, this is to be a thing of the past.

Do you recall the Science fiction thriller Soylent Green? It was produced in 1973 and it won 2 awards for its brilliance. While I am not partial to anything ‘Sciffie’ myself this movie however, had a profound effect on me. Way back then issues like the Greenhouse Effect, pollution, overpopulation and depleted resources were all part of this thought provoking movie. It was definitely a movie way ahead of its time. The one aspect that haunted me over the years was the substitute used for food. It was a tablet that had been produced from euthanised people!

What a frightening thought that the human race might have to resort to this!

A whole new experience….

I gingerly put my hand up to my mouth. Can I do this? ‘It’ had been disguised in a round ball filled with safe ingredients like oats, honey and coconut. But the ‘it’ bit was the worrying part of this suspicious wannabe truffle.

I had to remind myself of the many benefits of the ‘it’ ingredient in these deceitful little morsels. They have twice as much protein as beef (gram for gram), contain vitamin B12….which I am assured is excellent for my brain health. This is comforting as the threat of dementia looms…..a real concern as one starts to forget all the proper nouns in your vocabulary. ‘It’ also has plenty of calcium, far more than milk. That should please all the celiac sufferers out there.

So what is this magical food? I hesitate to tell you but here goes. It is none other than CRICKETS!

My skin crawled when I thought of dangling this six- legged creature into my mouth. I could hear the crunch of the exoskeleton and could feel the spikes on their back legs rough against my tongue. The idea of putting an insect into my mouth made me crawl!. As an ex Biology teacher I have spent hours studying and observing these little creatures. The last thing that I ever contemplated was popping one into my mouth! Oh how we need to adapt to change!

But all is not lost. This amazing new food source has produced a consumer friendly product. It is available in powder form and can be added into many different recipes to boost the protein content.

Imagine your favourite biscuit recipe with the added bonus of this extra nutrition. It certainly lessens the guilt. Greenies will also be pleased to know that using crickets as a source of protein is environmentally friendly.

Yes, crickets are easy to breed and are happiest in a confined space. Condo-like structures are used as breeding stations. These undemanding creepy crawlies also require less water and eat very little. It makes for a cost effective business venture as well as a highly nutritious food source.

All I am left to do is put past prejudices away and is to sneak some past my family and into the morning smoothie…….

I stood in the kitchen this morning and shouted at my new Echo Dot with a croaky morning voice. I needed to get the first sitting of breakfast going for my early morning skiers and my son who was returning back to work. Music and a bit of news in the morning really gets me going and this ‘little black apparatus’ was not about to oblige. I leaned and enunciated my words. This is often needed as my South African accent gets in the way of technology here in North America. I tried again and rolled out my best American accent that I could muster at 6am in the morning!

OK Google! Ok Google!

Why was this ….. machine not responding? Then I realised that I had my commands mixed up. Jeff Bezos of Amazon would not have been pleased with me as I was confusing my software system service providers.

Alexa, give me the latest news report?

“Here is the latest weather and news report for the Lonsdale area.”

Yes, it worked! I could now go into mommy mode whilst turning out a fine spread for my early risers.

Early morning skiers….

As with many of you, we have had all our children and grandchildren home over the holidays. Technology and getting mom and dad up to speed with the latest technology is all part of this visit. The furnace programme has been updated and reset, the fireplace switch is now remote and Alexa is installed in the kitchen. So I have the world at my finger tips and Big Brother is surely watching me! Ha! Ha! Who knows what he will learn?

Part of the technology update included hitting the Black Friday sales and renewing our ancient and faulty kitchen appliances. I decided to sell the old ones rather than let them end up in a landfill. They appeared on Craigslist for a bargain price and were all sold within days. What can I say? I have hidden talents! Was it the artistic photos of their gleaming stainless steel finish or the persuasive wording of the advert? Who knows? But at least they would whirr away in someone else’s kitchen for a while longer.

A sad farewell to our old fridge….

Along with the selling and buying of the appliances came the dilemma of getting them up and down our 3 flights of stairs to our house in the forest. The microwave, dishwasher and oven were all relatively light so that was easy. But when the new fridge arrived, the delivery guys took one look at the narrow and steep access and refused to help us. We had a problem that had to be solved. I had a house full and no fridge. But it was easier than I could have imagined.

We have a saying in South Africa: ‘n Boer maak ‘n plan. This translated means a farmer always makes a plan. In true form my son pulled his truck up next to the garage in front of the slope down to the house. They tied a sturdy rope onto the truck and around the new fridge. He pulled on his rugby boots for grip and they were all set. They slowly lowered the fridge down along the slope. I stood and watched and tried to contain my laughter and feelings of trepidation. What if this new fridge slipped and careered off into the river?

The rope is attached and away we go….

It did not……she stands proud in her new appointed place in my kitchen. The beers are cold and the steak is thawed and on the barbeque.  Soft sounds filtrate from the kitchen as Alexa serenades us with her latest playlist.

A very happy 2018!

But is was not all about technology, there was old fashioned fun too!

For the last year’s words belong to last year’s language. And next year’s words await another voice. And to make an end is to make a beginning. T.S. Eliot.

 

 

 

 

Have you ever wondered what a ‘bored housewife’ thinks about when she is completing all those mundane jobs around the house? There is nothing quite like a having your hands in the sink with dirty dishes or having ironing up to your eyeballs! It is the trigger for your mind to go into overdrive and to a most wonderful escape.

I am often asked the question: Don’t you get bored at home? Yes, I certainly do! There is nothing quite like coming to the harsh reality that you are no longer a useful member of the workforce. Someone who contributes to society and gets affirmation from job satisfaction and the people that work alongside you. Oh and don’t forget the remuneration at the end of the month too! I miss all those aspects of having a formal job.

Instead I am a domestic executive who runs a slick show. The washing basket is empty, the kitchen cupboards are well stocked and the freezer is groaning with enough to feed us till the New Year. The house is relatively clean too considering we have a Jack Russel that sheds at least a 1000 spikey white hairs daily. My job is not confined to the internal workings of the house alone. I even managed to run the Christmas lights up the outside staircase myself this year. I did contemplate our ladder and a more daring venture up the roof but decided that Christmas with a broken leg was not a good idea. My family would have been mortified! Who would have filled the domestic executive position? I somehow think that there would not have been many takers!

But back to the Christmas light chore …..I quickly realised that you needed to test the string of lights before you painstakingly thread it around the bannister. It is infuriating when you realise that they just don’t shine! So it was back to the drawing board. Extra bulbs were sourced and we were in business. There were many ‘choice words’ that filled the air during the whole process. But fortunately there was no one around to hear them.

The creative jobs and the challenging ones don’t require me to go wandering off in my mind.  I am totally engaged. The dressing of the Christmas tree was one such task that I just loved. I decided on a woodland theme being that we are tucked away in our forest. So all the creatures that frequent La Ravine are represented. Then I added a vintage display of old family photos. It is fascinating to note the family traits that have passed along the genes. That strong chin is ever present!

My woodland Christmas tree….

So what are my plans for the New Year career wise?

My trajectory looks rosy as there are opportunities to develop my creativity and to explore the thoughts that drift in and out as I go about my daily chores. The domestic executive has the elevated position of being a domestic goddess and I am loving it!

Best wishes go to all my family, friends and the readers of my blog for the holiday season. I hope that you get to put your feet up in front of the fireplace or barbeque depending on whether you are in the Northern or Southern hemispheres. Thank you for taking the time to read my blogs as this allows me the indulgence of putting those wandering thoughts into a written piece.

The domestic goddess with my granddaughter, Kate.

From the day we arrive on this planet………

A robin has set up home under the eve outside our basement door. Initially she took flight each time I opened the door. Even a saunter past in the garden would put her defences up. That was 2 weeks ago and a lot has changed since then. Both Mr and Mrs Robin are doing stints of duty on the 3 dainty blue eggs. They appear to have built up enough trust or maybe the recurring pyjama drill has worn them down. They remain firmly ensconced in their nest while I carry out my daily gardening rituals. The keen observers now know my movements and my habits. I hope that they will choose my garden next summer!

The young robins….

It’s the circle of life……

The importance of having HISTORY with others was brought home to me yet again this week.  There is comfort in knowing you have both walked a similar road albeit for a short time in your life.

Whatever happened to …….?  There were so many questions and stories to tell and much to catch up. Both of us had moved countries so there was recent common ground too. Oh how wonderful it felt to sit and talk to someone who actually knew who I was in my ‘other life.’! We all need that sense of commonality with others as it reminds us what it is like to experience ‘the familiar.’  Shared memories are triggered by the familiar idiosyncrasies that have long been forgotten. We experience this when we get together with old friends or those that just feel like ‘old friends.’ There is comfort when you have walked a road with someone. They know where you come from, have experienced some of your highlights and sad moments and just know all your ‘streke!’

A visit from a friend….

Till we find our place on the path unwinding…..

Although the feeling of having your ‘old’ history brought home to you is comforting, it is essential that you create new history with the people you meet and the new places that you discover. I enjoy creating new rituals too. This can take the form of something simple like having a regular coffee bar.  The barista smiles as she recalls your order, “One shot latte coming up!”’ You might take it one step further and have your favourite spot near the window. This is where you observe the world go by. How basic is our need to belong?

Relocation means creating new history and a new friendship circle. In order to do this I need to don my brave hat and put myself out there! I am embarrassingly spontaneous so I just let this happen. If I feel the urge to talk to someone, then I simply do! Sometimes I get a strange look but I don’t let that deter me. You just need to find the common ground and then you have a jumping off point.

Would you like to join me for coffee after class?

Coffee with a friend along the sea walk….

Unfortunately I have been remiss. This blog was started during the summer but the amazing weather did not allow me to complete it. I was too busy creating new history! My computer could not compete with long walks along the seafront and my summer garden. But the Vancouver rain has come and we all pull our rain jackets from the back of the cupboard. I am getting used to the rhythm and what to expect here on the west coast of Canada..

It is the Circle of Life.

 And it moves us all

Through despair and hope

Through faith and love

Till we find our place

 On the path unwinding

The twins making history together…..