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Posts Tagged ‘comfortable’

Like a small boat on the ocean sending big waves into motion…..
My hand works skilfully up and down the clear window pane. A stray hair blows across my face and I stop and gaze out towards the river. It lies dormant with its thick ice cap and dainty snow crystals that cling to the surrounding trees. As with all tasks that are repetitive, it helps to keep in the rhythm. Up and down the soft cloth soothes…..it will be the last time. I reach down low to the small finger prints of the twins. I falter and then continue with my stroke. One swish and the sticky marks have been erased. It has begun. I have begun the process of cleaning, sorting, throwing out and the packing of boxes.
My power is turned on……

A rekkie in Vancouver this last week.....

A rekkie in Vancouver this last week…..

The Groot Trek Mark 2 will be a mere 3500 km from Toronto to Vancouver. We rush around and get our house ready for the inevitable Show Day. We replace light bulbs, make lists and run backwards and forwards to donate accumulated ‘things’ to the thrift store. Personal items like our cherished family photographs are all safely packed away. The house needs to appear to prospective buyers like a blank canvas. What a hard task that is! It is as if Maison de Morkel never existed. In our hearts it still does and I remind myself that it is healthy to visit all this sentimentally. The downsizing has begun…..
This is my fight song…….
“I can do this.” I tell myself as I round the corner on my way back from the lake. It is strange……the other day I was priding myself on my exceptional navigational skills. I know all the short cuts and seldom get lost. The monotone voice of my SATNAV used to be my constant companion but her job is in definite jeopardy. I finally have a sense of belonging here in Oakville. It has taken almost 5 years for that wonderful state of ‘I belong here’ to kick in. But as life has it, one must never get too comfortable or feel just a tad complacent. Immigration has certainly taught me to accept change and CHANGE I must….. It does not help to fight this new state but rather to channel my energy into preparing for our new life in Vancouver.
Starting right now I will be strong….
We leave behind our 2 sons and our dear friends. My heart feels heavy at the mere thought of it. One gets used to keeping your family close when you do this ‘country hop.’ It is going to seem strange not to have them popping in for a chat, dad’s steak or mom’s pasta. We are so grateful to the friends and neighbours who have been there for us. They have shared all our trials and tribulations. It is a bitter sweet move as the rest of our family awaits our arrival on the other side. I see 2 little faces running up our driveway.
No doubt Jack and Kate will make new finger prints on our Vancouver abode.

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Christmas with the family in Toronto 2015.

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I turn 60 today! A milestone in anyone’s book and it comes with feelings of trepidation. Somehow the dreaded SIX has just come around too fast and I don’t feel quite ready for it. It is not the usual fears of the body starting to issue screams of protest when I attack yet a new outdoor hobby or the laughter lines that just seem to grow. It is the dread that I suppose I will now have to grow up!

When does one refrain from wearing your much loved blue jeans? Is there some special code of dress that I have to adhere to at this stage?  Maybe a twin set and pearls is more fitting. But the Woodstock Era with its flower power accessories still run deep in my veins. Can I still don my purple tights with white spots or better still the Christmas ones covered in reindeer?

Out paddling on Lake Ontario.

Out paddling on Lake Ontario.

 

Can I still jump up and dance when I hear a favourite song on the radio? (I know this childish act is usually a source of embarrassment to my family.)Is there still room for a good sulk? Will I be allowed to play pot-hockey in the kitchen when I find the house chores tedious?

I stumble into the bathroom and turn on the light. It is one of those awfully bright ones that does not lie. Yes, the face is gently showing the signs of the time and the grey hair is competing like a champion. It is inevitable and I accept it all gracefully……. not too gracefully as I shall continue to ‘put on the face’ each morning. Fortunately my sensitive eyes don’t allow me to use much ‘toorgoedjies’ which is probably a blessing in disguise. I prefer my morning ritual to be as fast as possible so that I can begin my day. So no pink blushing cheeks or purple eye shadow……..a sweep of cover stick and a dash of lipstick will have to suffice. The time has come for ‘less is more.’

'Twinset and pearls' but without the 'toergoed.'

‘Twinset and pearls’ but without the ‘toorgoedjies.’

It is liberating when you don’t concern yourself too much with what others think or say and you can merely be comfortable in your own skin. I have definitely been there and have the t-shirt and I wear my badges with honour. But having said this, I do not intend to just sit and watch my garden grow. Complacency is not something that I visit too often. I wish I did, as it would certainly do wonders for the old blood pressure spike! There is just too much out there to tempt me…….. a whole world still left to explore, books to read, music to listen to and people to meet.  It is good to be alive and hope that I don’t grow up any time soon.

 

You don’t have to try so hard
You don’t have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don’t have to change a single thing

 

......with a little help from my friends!

……with a little help from my friends!

 

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The thrill of the first snow flakes

It had been a long and tedious trip. I could not sleep and continuously searched for a position that felt comfortable. It was not to be and I just lay there with my eyes closed and reflected on the last 10 days that I had spent in South Africa.

I had only been away for a year but it seems like an eternity….. so much had happened during that time. I had managed to drive on the ‘wrong side’ of the road, stand up on my skis and actually wend my way down a slope. I had built up muscle in parts of my body that I never knew existed and all the yard work was surely keeping me limber! Every day was a challenge of learning, remembering and experiencing new things. Just to memorise my telephone number took a few months, as I have never bothered ‘my pretty little head’ with such trivial things. Who needs to remember when you can just enter the number in your cell phone? It also took a while to recognise the coins, as I only ever used them for parking meters!

Things are beginning to feel familiar. The ‘firsts’ are becoming seconds, thirds and fourths. I can now find my way around town without quivering in my boots and actually recognize a few landmarks. I greet my pharmacist by name and the cashiers at the supermarket smile when they recognize me. I am certainly in there frequently enough! The baker, who makes the most delicious seed loaf, always inquires about our life ‘back home.’ We continue the sequel each week as I stock up on my supply of freshly baked bread. I suppose I just don’t feel like a Barberton daisy that is trying to survive in a busy street anymore!

The wait in Amsterdam dragged and I was finally on my last leg of the trip. As I arrived at the gate I was informed that I had been bumped up to business class. Hoorah! They must have noticed this bedraggled passenger and taken pity on her. I spread myself out and sank into my soft leather seat. I stretched my legs out and wiggled my toes. I was in 7th heaven! Then I was plied with French champagne and served an elegant supper. I was absorbed by all the new delights and the array of movies that were on offer on the in-flight entertainment. I could not help notice my neighbour who was quite blasé about the whole experience. He was obviously one of the frequent business class flyers and I stood out like a sore thumb with my naivety and enthusiasm.

Over the past year I have certainly displayed my vulnerability with all the change that has occurred.  But I have also recognized the enthusiasm that exists deep inside me and the strength to cope with life’s challenges. I have felt the wind beneath my wings……  

One of ‘the firsts’…watching football.

 

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